- Reflect on your life.
- Find in what situation you blamed others. Forgive them.
Who is the controller of your life?
Is it me? You cannot control your life. If you fall down you will have to go to the hospital. I do not have control. Then what is the meaning of this statement. When I surrender to the Divinity only, I will take control of my life.
Let us go deeper now. I am not the doer and Divine is the doer. This we will accept lovingly.
Here we have to cultivate the habit that you are not the doer. What happens when I am the doer? Everything will be wrong then. But everything goes right when you think that Divine is the doer. When you think that Divine is the doer, there will be surrender.
A tendency to blame others
We always have the tendency to blame others. We say, “I didn’t have proper sleep because my wife always disturbs me,” When there is no power supply we blame the government. When I am hurt in an accident, we say, “I was properly walking but that auto fellow came and hit me”.
In ordinary life, for each and every situation or event we will be blaming others. Who is spoiling me in my life? When you blame others you have to remember that he is also not the doer. Nobody is responsible for this.
When I am not the doer we happily accept that. When your work is blocked or delayed, the divine is waiting for the right time and he is the doer. When you bring this thinking you can take control of your life.
“My Mother is the cause of my husband’s death”, a case history
One mother and daughter are there. Daughter is married and more than 45 years old, living in a foreign country. About five years back her father expired. The mother has three daughters and all are away.
Mother used to disturb the daughters telling that somebody has to come and look after her. In their caste only the daughter has to look after the mother it seems. I asked the daughter to cut the cord (between the mother and her).
One day, the mother asked the daughter, “Suppose if your husband dies, whether you will come back to me”. The son-in-law died after three months. From then on the daughter could not forgive her mother at all. Whenever she sees her mother she becomes angry. But that lady is a philosophical lady.
The daughter came to me and told that even after taking the Bach Flower Remedies Holly and Willow she could not be alright. I told her that Holly and Willow say to you that you have to change your attitude.
When you say that you are not the doer, then you think that your mother is also not the doer. Keep chanting. “I am not the doer, she is not the doer and Divine is the doer”. After chanting this for one hour her heart became lighter. For the next two days she was chanting this and she became completely alright.
Till such time you are blaming others you are not in control of your life. So, whatever may be the problem, think that the Divine is the doer! The problem will be solved automatically. Then only you can take control of your life.
Posted in Affirmations, Bach Flower Remedy, Family, Forgiveness, Life
Tags: about, Accept, accident, angry, Attitude, auto, automatically, “Divine is the doer”, “I am not the doer”, Bach flower remedies, became, blame, blamed, blaming, blocked, case history, Cause, change, control, controller, cord, country, cultivate, daughter, daughters, death, delayed, died, dies, disturbs, Divine, divinity, doer, down, event, expired, fall, father, Find, Find Life Answers, for, foreign, Forgive, government, Habit, happily, heart, hit, holly, hospital, Hurt, husband, I, Life, lighter, living, Love, lovingly, married, meaning, mother, my, Naran S. Balakumar, no, of, on, others, philosophical, power, problem, proper, Reflect, responsible, right, situation, sleep, solved, son-in-law, spoiling, supply, surrender, take, taking, tendency, think, time, to, waiting, wife, Willow, work, wrong, your
I had been trying out all the mantras and switch words you had suggested to me. I had been religiously taking the remedies you had recommended. Yet I am not seeing the results I want.
I still don’t have a good job. My marriage is in shambles. Neither my parents nor my in-laws are happy about me.
Luckily, I am yet to have kids. Otherwise, I am afraid they will be cursing me too.
My simple question to you is, “Why can’t I be happy and lead a satisfactory life-like others?”
Sorry! I am feeling very skeptical here and feeling much disappointed too.
A Few questions to you first
What is “Thanks”?
What is “Acceptance”?
Why should we accept everything totally – whether what is happening in our life is to our liking or not?
When I am lucky…
I get what I want.
I thank the Divine.
But I forget to pray for others who have not got because of my getting.
When I am not lucky…
But, I am denied.
I feel sad or angry instead of thanking for not getting what I want.
In other words, I am resenting the gift to someone.
This sadness of anger over my not getting is truly resenting others and denying the Divine Order by violating the quantum law: “All is one. One is all”.
Why can’t I be unhappy, when I fail, you may ask?
When I resent or feel sad, I cannot receive when my turn comes (yes! it comes to you one day for sure).
Therefore, when I am denied, I accept and thank god for giving to someone.
I thank God, because my prayers got someone what he wanted.
Denial to me is a gift to someone who needs more than me.
So I Thank the Divine
Let me feel happy about it.
Let me accept it.
With OPEN HEART and QUIET MIND, I ACCEPT and THANK the DIVINE for anything and everything in my life.
I thank when I receive.
I thank when I am denied, while others receive.
So I Thank the Divine in Advance, for one day, my wants will be fulfilled, my prayers will be answered, and I will receive the gifts I desire as I have understood today that my acceptance and attitude of gratitude at any stage will get me everything, when my turn comes.
Posted in Affirmations, Family, Life
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From the “I Love Myself” Workbook
Do the following exercise
Sometimes body does not accept certain types of food. Yet, we try to eat the same food again and again.
Instead you have to prepare a list of items which you can eat and list out all those which your body does not accept.
When you prepare the list you are giving a commitment to your body and you need to follow that.
- Another thing is that whatever ways you behave outside we behave in the same manner with the body too. “I should not say this because the other person will be wounded”. Thinking like this, to please him, we tell a lie.
When you can’t meet a commitment, don’t make one
Suppose someone invites us for wedding. To please him we say that we will come definitely. But, we do not go to the wedding at all. I have also committed such mistakes.
Later on I found out that when I say something it is not a commitment to that person but it is a commitment to the God. I questioned myself, “Am I cheating the universe”?
Then I decided to tell the truth. If I am able to go I will say yes. Otherwise, I will say that I will not be able to make it.
Like that if you tell me that you are meeting me next week then it means that you are not making a commitment to me but you are committing to the Universe.
Commitment to our body
If one food is not being accepted by the body, we tell that I should not eat this food again. This is a commitment that you are giving to the Universe.
Next time when we eat that food again then we are breaking our own commitment.
The Universe is always watching all of us because it is the web of life. If I have to get my food at 1 p.m., it is already decided that it will come from a particular person.
By restraining yourself by not eating certain food, you are honoring your own body.
Posted in I Love Myself, Physical Health
Tags: able, Accept, “I Love Myself”, “Meet your commitments to your body”, be, behave, Body, breaking, can, cheating, commitment, commitments, core, decided, definitely, eat, exercise, following, food, found, God, honoring, invites, items, lie, Life, like, list, manner, means, meet, mistakes, Naran S. Balakumar, need, Next, outside, own, prepare, questioned, restraining, say, tell, thinking, time, Truth, types, Universe, watching, ways, web, wedding, week, will, workbook, wounded
Reply to Suja by Naran S. Balakumar
Read your mail.
You have not received a job offer yet, in spite of having completed your post-graduation as a rank holder nine months ago. I know that you have done your diploma in Business Management too. Congratulations!
You have mentioned that you are feeling frustrated, dejected, getting angry, as well as blaming god and others for your situation. Given the situation this is the normal reaction we can expect from anyone.
What did you learn in your Management course? One has to think differently to find a solution. Therefore, think differently. Find out whether your thoughts and feelings are energizing you or they are draining you. These feelings will not only keep you in the same state of not getting a job, but will make your life stagnate too.
Get Into the State of Employment
Since you are a mathematics student, I will explain this in the form of a mathematical equation.
X = Y + 10, where X is the event of not getting a job and Y is your present state of mind. You do not have a direct influence over X. But, you can change Y into Y-1 or Y-2., which will in turn affect and change X. I mean, if you change your state of mind (Y), X cannot remain the same. Because Y has changed, X has to change too. Thus a state of unemployment will change into a state of employment.
Utilize the Lean Period
Think differently. You have to utilize this dark period. Accept that this period is necessary for you. May be the learning is not yet over for you. Academically it may be over. But, learning has to be continued. Learn something new in this period. You need not pay for a course. You can pick up lot of stuff from Internet. Learn something more about subjects that are allied to your specialisation. Enjoy the interviews that come your way. You will learn what you don’t know. Fill up those gaps. Learn to listen.
Increase your self-esteem
You can learn a lot by observing people. Learn to understand your existing relationships – with your family members, friends, and relatives. Move with them closely, express and communicate with love as if you were meeting them for the first time and as though this would be the last time you are going to meet them. Contribute something to them lovingly. Help them in any manner you can. It need not be financial. This will boost your self-confidence and enthusiasm. Normally one feels confident and enthusiastic only after getting the job. Now, you are acquiring this state before getting the job.
Period of Relaxation
This will also make you a better person. You will learn how to relate to your colleagues and superiors. When you are ready to learn anything new, then this period would become a period of relaxation, instead of a period of frustration.
Self-Mastery is the Key
Learn about yourself. Understanding your mental state will be highly beneficial. Write a journal of the emotions you are feeling for one week. Also write about your reactions to events as well as your behavior. Watch your emotions and thought patterns. Put everything in writing. To your surprise, you will find a pattern in your behavior. This is your mental state in the past. This is going to be the mental state for your future if you don’t make changes to yourself. Circumstances may change. Events may change. But this is you.
Fulfillment At last
Therefore, utilize this period to effect a change where necessary. Release what you don’t need and develop more what you need. This self-rectification will help you in self-actualization. Self-actualization is nothing but self-fulfillment in life. Job is offered by god. The employer is only a tool. God is your employer. He will always do what is right and is required by you.
Chant OM NAMO BAGAVATHE.
Best of luck
Naran S Balakumar
Posted in Career, Job Related, Life
Tags: Academically, Accept, acquiring, Acu-Reiki, affect, allied, Animal Spirit Guides, Bach Flower Remedy, be, behavior, beneficial, Best of luck, blaming, Body, boost, change, chant, Chennai, Circumstances, closely, colleagues, Color Therapy, Colour Therapy, communicate, completed, Confident, Congratulations, Connection, continued, Contribute, course, Crystal, dark period, dejected, develop, Differently, diploma in Business Management, direct, Done, draining, EFT, emotions, employer, employment, energizing, Enthusiasm, enthusiastic, event, existing, expect, explain, express, Family, feeling, feels, fill, financial, Find, first time, form, friends, frustrated, frustration, Fulfillment, future, gaps, Gem Remedy, getting, getting angry, God, Healing CD, Help, Homeopathy, IEIT, Increase, India, influence, Intelligence, Internet, interviews, Job, journal, Karuna Reiki, Key, last time, Lean, Learn, learning, Life, listen, Living with Awareness, Love, lovingly, mail, Mantra, Master, mathematical equation, mathematics, Meditation, Meditation CD, meeting, members, mental state, Mind, Mudra, Naran, necessary, need, new, Next, nine months, NLP, normal, Normally, not, Now, observing, offer, OM NAMO BAGAVATHE, one, others, past, patterns, pay, people, Period, pick, post-graduation, present, R Mohan, rank holder, reaction, reactions, Read, Ready, received, Reiki, relate, relationships, relatives, relaxation, release, Remedies, Reply, required, right, S Balakumar, self-actualization, self-confidence, self-esteem, self-fulfillment, Self-Mastery, self-rectification, situation, solution, specialisation, stagnate, State, student, stuff, subjects, superiors, surprise, Switch Word, Tamil Nadu, Tapping, Therapist, think, thought, thoughts, tool, turn, understand, unemployment, up, Utilize, Watch, week, with, write, writing, Yoga
Don’t forget to read till the last line please!!!
Once there was a sweeper in the Well Known temple and he was very sincere and devoted. Every time he saw thousands of devotees coming to take darshan of the Lord, he thought that the Lord is standing all the time and giving darshan and He must be feeling very tired. So one day very innocently he asked the Lord whether he can take the place of the Lord for a day so that the Lord can have some relief and rest. The Deity of Temple replied, “I do not mind taking a break. I will transform you like myself, but you must do one thing. You must just stand here like me, smile at everyone and just give benedictions. Do not interfere with anything and do not say anything. Remember you are the deity and you just have faith that I have a master plan for everything.” The sweeper agreed to this.
The next day the sweeper took the position of the deity and a rich man came and prayed to the Lord. He offered a nice donation and prayed that his business should be prosperous. While going, the rich man inadvertently left his wallet full of money right there. Now the sweeper in the form of deity could not call him and so he decided to control himself and keep quiet.
Just then a poor man came and he put one coin in the Hundi and said that it was all he could afford and he prayed to the Lord that he should continue to be engaged in the Lord’s service. He also said that his family was in dire need of some basic needs but he left it to the good hands of the Lord to give some solution. When he opened his eyes, he saw the wallet left by the rich man. The poor man thanked the Lord for His kindness and took the wallet very innocently. The sweeper in the form of the Deity could not say anything and he had to just keep smiling.
At that point a sailor walked in. He prayed for his safe journey as he was going on a long trip. Just then the rich man came with the police and said that somebody has stolen his wallet and seeing the sailor there, he asked the police to arrest him thinking that he might have taken it. Now the sweeper in the form of Deity wanted to say that the sailor is not the thief and he could not say and he was greatly frustrated. The sailor looked at the Lord and asked why he an innocent person is being punished. The rich man looked at the Lord and thanked Him for finding the thief. The sweeper in the deity form could no more tolerate and he thought that even if the real Lord had been here, he would have definitely interfered and hence he started speaking and said that the sailor is not the thief but it was the poor man who took away the wallet. The rich man was very thankful as also the sailor.
In the night, the real Lord came and He asked the sweeper how the day was. The sweeper said, “I thought it would be easy, but now I know that your days are not easy, but I did one good thing.” Then he explained the whole episode to the Lord. The Lord became very upset on hearing this whereas the sweeper thought the Lord would appreciate him for the good deed done.
The Lord asked, “Why did you not just stick to the plan? You had no faith in me. Do you think that I do not understand the hearts of all those who come here? All the donation which the rich man gave was all stolen money and it is only a fraction of what he really has and he wants me to reciprocate unlimitedly. The single coin offered by the poor man was the last coin he was having and he gave it to me out of faith. The sailor might not have done anything wrong, but if the sailor were to go in the ship that night he was about to die because of bad weather and instead if he is arrested he would be in the jail and he would have been saved form a greater calamity. The wallet should go to the poor man because he will use it in my service. I was going to reduce the rich man’s karma also by doing this and save the sailor also. But you cancelled everything because you thought you know my plan and you made your own plans.”
God has plans and justice for everyone….we just have to have patience…………
– From an email sent by MM Elango
We always do everything partially. We believe in God. We have trust in God. We have bakthi. But nothing is total. We say we are surrendering. Only one part of the mind surrenders. The other parts will doubt and prevent our total surrender.
When we have total surrender we accept what is happening and when we accept instead of resisting, God’s plan is revealed. When you totally surrender, you will not question anything but witness anything that is happening.
Is it possible to reach that stage? I don’t know. But we have to try and keep on trying.
Daily Pray, “Let all parts of my mind surrender”. With this intention, chant the mantra, “Om Hum Namaha”. Hum is the bija mantra which will make one to surrender to god. All the inflexible resisting doubting parts will join the surrendering part.
When you wake up in the morning say, “This is the God-given day. Whatever I do, I do it for him.”
Posted in Healing By Stories, Life
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In this world there are four rules:
- You don’t get what you desire or what you want.
- You get what you don’t desire or what you don’t want.
In between these two rules, how to create what we want?
- To get what you want, accept what you get. When you accept what you get, you like what you get.
- When you like what you get, you get what you want.
A case history
My in-laws came here last Sunday. From the day they came here, my three-year old daughter Hema wants all her work to be done by my mother in-law. That actually doesn’t bother me.
However, I like to sleep with Hema. It so happened today that she wants to sleep with my MIL, instead of sleeping with me. I felt really bad that Hema does not understand my feelings and is avoiding me. I felt, ‘Am I not giving enough love to her?”
My MIL feels really happy when Hema ignores me and says that she wants to be with my in-laws.
Now I’m hurt that Hema is totally ignoring me and doesn’t want to sleep with me!
There is no motive for any child to behave rudely. It is natural that all the children want to be with their grand parents. Go to my blog and read the story of Mangala on Bach Flower CD: http://healbymeditation.wordpress.com/2009/04/24/meditation-on-bach-flowers/
Allow the child to be as she is. The more and more you want your child to be with you, at the same time have a grudge against your mother in law the child will be drawn to her only.
- Chant the switch words, “Together Divine”
- Also, take the Bach Flower Remedies Holly and Chicory. Give it to your MIL also. Put Walnut and Willow in the common water.
- Tap on yourself (all the points) continuously whenever you find time and affirm, “I accept totally what is happening to me. Love Thanks Divine.”
Suffering mentally is optional. Whenever we accept what is happening, we get a new meaning to our life and at the same time, whatever we wish will happen automatically.
When my MIL laughs and speaks that my kid is very much attached to her rather than me, then I get the grudge on her. She has once told our family members, in front of me, that she wants my kid to be attached to her rather than me. I was hurt with her words. You may think that I’m blaming her. This is the fact and this is how she spoke.
Anyhow let me try chanting the affirmations and let you know.
What we do normally when we are wounded or hurt. We may grudge, blame, curse dislike and become furious. All these emotions get outside our auric field, get clogged in the atmosphere and influence or affect us because we draw the same energy from the atmosphere.
Moreover constant and consistent undesirable emotions of this type may travel and join similar emotions in the world, paving way for violence, murder etc. Thus, we contribute indirectly to the violent world outside. Do you want to hold on to these emotions?
Another way is just to accept and ignore wherever possible, the comments made by your MIL.
Affirm to yourself, “Hurting others is her (MIL) nature. Loving and becoming lovable (whatever may be the provocation) is my nature”. If you practise this (very difficult), she will also change.
Changing yourself should be your goal. Take it as a challenge.
Do a lot of forgiving exercise. This will give you more power.
Take the remedies. You will understand.
Posted in Affirmations, Bach Flower Remedy, EFT, Family, Life, SwitchWord, Tapping
Tags: Accept, Acu-Reiki, Affirmation, Animal Spirit Guides, atmosphere, attached, auric field, automatically, avoid, Bach, Bach Flower Meditation CD, Balakumar, blaming, Body, challenge, change, Chennai, Chicory, child, children, Connection, curse, desire, dislike, do not get, EFT, Family, feelings, felt bad, Flower, forgiveness exercise, furious, Gem, grand parents, grudge, happen, happening, happy, holly, home work, Hurt, hurting, IEIT, ignore, India, Intelligence, Life, like, lovable, Love Thanks, loving, Mantra, Master, meaning, Meditation, Mind, mother, mother-in-law, motive, Mudra, murder, Naran, natural, NLP, Pills, power, provocation, R Mohan, Reiki, Remedies, Remedy, rude, rules, sleep, study, suffering mentally, Switch Word, Tapping, Therapist, Together Divine, understand, unwanted, violence, Walnut, want, Water, Willow, wish, world, wounded, Yoga
We had to vacate the house that we had been staying for last 6 years. My husband wanted a house close to his office, while I wanted something closer to where we are living now. Therefore, he wanted me to make some adjustment.
During the house search when I was getting down the stairs of a house, I tripped and fell down. I developed pain in my thigh! This was disturbing my mind. I knew the cause based on the theories you taught on mind-body intelligence. I cursed myself for forgetting to thank the house before entering it.
We went to the same house this weekend. This time I thanked the house before entering it. The house looked beautiful and perfect. I fell in love with it. The rent is little over our budget. We are hoping that the house owner will agree to our price.
Naran S. Balakumar
It is nice to know that you are becoming sensitive to the body. For the others to come to our terms, chant the Bach Flower Remedies Mimulus and Walnut. Alternatively, write the names of the flowers in a piece of paper and keep it with you. Walnut is for adjustment!
Wherever we go, we should be ready to pay the price that it deserves. However, if there is budget constraint, call Wolf and ask the animal spirit to get you a nice good house that is well within your budget. Once the work is over, thank God profusely from the heart for guiding you through nature. You can do this even before you occupy the house.
A house definitely is out there, which suits your budget and taste. Pray that you should find it. “Together Find Divine Order Now Done” – SwitchWords can accomplish that for you. For that matter, you can achieve anything through prayers.
“When I was getting down the stairs I tripped and fell down.”
Coming down is a problem for you. You are worried that you will lose control. There is nothing wrong to go beyond one’s ego. Your ego and pride is creating blocks for you.
Surprisingly, the inner or spiritual meaning of coming down is adjustment. Adjustment and compromise will open the doors for the universal love to operate. When it operates, loving people will always surround our lives. We will attract those who love us. The key word for Walnut is “adjust”. Alternatively, you can chant the SwitchWord Adjust.
Walnut alone can open your heart. There is no limit for the opening of the heart.
For various articles on Bach Flower Remedies, please click the link: http://www.naranheal.com/mudras.php?cat_id=50 and for more information on Animal Spirit Guides, please check: http://www.naranheal.com/mudras.php?page=1&cat_id=49
Posted in Bach Flower Remedy, Life, SwitchWord
Tags: Accept, Acknowledge, Adjust, Animal Spirit Guides, Bach Flower Remedy, Balakumar, Bargain, Compromise, Divine Order, Done, Ego, Find, Mimulus, Naran, Now, Prayer, Switch Word, SwitchWord, Thanks, Together, Walnut, Wolf