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Goal is to find harmony and happiness

“Arise Awake and Stop Not Till the Goal is Reached” – Swami Vivekananda

Who is to be blamed if there is no harmony within the family?

In any situation, when one finds oneself opposed, confronted, misunderstood, blamed or being overthrown,  one either feels angry or feels  depressed  or worried.

What is to be tackled here – your mind or him? Everybody wants to change the other person. What is the hidden situation here?

If you want the other person to change, should you not think about changing yourself?  Without ourselves changing, we cannot change others.

If there is disharmony then both are responsible for that and both have to change. This is simple logic.

How to purchase the harmony I seek in my life?

  1. Ask a simple question to yourself.  What do I want?
  2. What emotions or thoughts I need to have so that I can achieve what I want?
  3. What behavior of mine or my action will take me – move, towards this goal?
  4. On the other hand, what state of mind will take me away from my goal – my anger or forgiveness, my worry or my endurance (giving love in spite of not receiving), and my sadness or my fortitude?

If you are 100% sure that your anger or resentment or longing for love, care, affection can take you to harmony or the desired goal, you can have anything.

But once you decide (Itcha Sakthi) that only my endurance or forgiveness can achieve my goal then take the appropriate action (Kriya Sakthi) that is conducive to the goal of harmony, love and understanding.

In other words, your thought, your expression, and your behavior should be conducive towards your goal.

If you think that forgiveness, love and gratitude can achieve this, bring them in your thoughts, expressions and behavior.

The disadvantages of being in a state of victim

The only thing that may interfere in your progress is your ego.

A state of mind which cannot achieve what is desired is a state of victim.  Having known that this victim state cannot achieve, why do you hang on to it?

  • Not knowing that my state of mind prevents me from achieving my aim is the first blunder.
  • Having known that a particular state of mind – victim mentality, cannot achieve what you want and doing nothing about it is the second blunder.

Once you come to know that forgiveness alone, endurance alone, kindness and gratitude alone, can achieve what you want, then go all out for that, with full of courage and moral will.

This is what I meant when I said “BRING IN INTERNAL CHANGE”.

We may fail in the course of time. But don’t be upset over failure. Failure is just a reminder to correct our attitude and move forward.

Karma Vs Free Will

(From a telephone conversation)

Ranga

On one hand, you say our life is pre-destined. On the other hand, you also say we need to heal ourselves. I think, you are contradicting yourself.

Naran

As you are calling me, I am trying to fix my scissors, which is broken – one side of it is blunt, and so I am not able to use it. All of us know the fact that both the pieces of scissors are required for it to be useful, as one piece of scissors alone cannot do the job (of cutting).

Likewise, Karma and Free Will are two parts of healing that we have in life. One part alone cannot do the trick.

Healing transforms and changes a person.

Are we not using our free-will in our life?

No. We do every action unconsciously. We feel, think and behave over which we have no control as we feel and behave like a robot. Thus, we are operating from our lower free-will.

Healing uses higher free-will to bring internal change in a person, to effect a conscious behavior. Healing teaches you to choose the empowering emotions to change your attitude to your life. In addition, healing doesn’t alter anything outside of one. It is happening inside us.

What happens when we use our lower free-will?

When we use our lower free-will we are ruled by our emotions. For example, when there is a conflict, we use angry words. How can anger resolve anger (conflict)?

Thus, we add more to our karma, staying in troubled waters. How does somebody who is also in troubled water can save us? Only a person above the water – a person not influenced by his emotions, can help us. Such persons operate from their higher free-will, overcoming Karma and lessening it.

Both Karma and Healing help us learn our life lessons

Karma teaches us some lessons that make us whole and complete. If we don’t learn our lessons, our life is repeated in the same fashion – meaning the same karma in action.

So both, healing and karma do the same job in a different way. Both are required.

If somebody thinks that he can achieve anything in life by healing, he will fail for sure, as he is limited by his karma.

On the other hand, if somebody believes that he is destined to live in a particular way, then he will also fail, as we can heal our karma, by bringing an internal change.

What is an internal change? Internal change is nothing but evolving to ascend.

Thus, both Karma and Higher Free-will are required by us, to make our life whole and complete.

70 Days Programme for Finding a Good Life Partner

Affirmations for finding your life partner – read the instructions after the list of affirmations

1.      God, the loving omnipresent, the all-providing source of all relationships is individualized in me.

2.      I elevate my mind and heart to understand that Divine Presence I AM is the source of all my relationships.

3.      I am conscious of the Divine Presence as my life partner.  I am also conscious of the constant activity of this higher mind of infinite love.  My consciousness is filled with this Truth.

4.      Through my consciousness of my Divine-self – My source of love – I draw and fill up my thoughts and emotions with the omnipresent Divine love.

5.      I am aware, I understand and know that the all-providing Divine mind manifests as my life partner at the right time.  My trust in this truth is guiding me.

6.      My Divine mind works instantly constantly according to my needs and desires and with the Divine love operating through me, I remain always fulfilled… and every desire of mine is fulfilled.

7.      The Divine love that I am, is forever expressing its nature of Abundant happiness.  My getting the life partner is the responsibility of the Divine Presence within.  I am totally confident in letting go all my worries and letting God appear as the life partner in my life.

8.      My awareness of the spirit within me as the source of my love is making my life new, lifting me up from the past.  I experience this Divine love manifesting in all walks of my life.

9.      Since I am aware that God-self is the only relation, I am totally fulfilled.  I have found the secret of life and now I relax with the belief that Divine love is eternally operating in my life.  I Continue to be aware of this flow of Divine love which is continuously easily pouring from my Divine consciousness.

10.  My entire focus is on God within, the only relation in my life.  The god – within is active in all my affairs and I see the Divine principle in action on my behalf.

Instructions for doing this 70 days exercise

1.      In 1st cycle of 10 days – write one affirmation one day for 10 days. That is you will be writing 10 affirmations for 10 days.

2.      Leave a gap of 10 days, that is do not write the affirmation and just contemplate/meditate on the affirmation (for the day) for 10 days. Write the switch words, “CONCEDE CLEAR CENTRE FIND DIVINE PARTNER” 100 times daily

3.      In second cycle of 10 days – write one affirmation one day for 10 days. That is you will be writing 10 affirmations for 10 days.

4.      Leave a gap of 10 days, that is do not write the affirmation and just contemplate/meditate on the affirmation (for the day) for 10 days. Write the switch words, “CONCEDE CLEAR CENTRE FIND DIVINE PARTNER” 100 times daily

5.      In third cycle of 10 days – write one affirmation one day for 10 days. That is you will be writing 10 affirmations for 10 days.

6.      Leave a gap of 10 days, that is do not write the affirmation and just contemplate/meditate on the affirmation (for the day) for 10 days. Write the switch words, “CONCEDE CLEAR CENTRE FIND DIVINE PARTNER” 100 times daily

7.      In fourth cycle of 10 days – write one affirmation one day for 10 days. That is you will be writing 10 affirmations for 10 days.

Please ensure that this exercise is done daily on regular basis and if you miss this even on one day you have to restart the programme from the beginning.

How and why we need to forgive others

For more detailed explanation on Why we need to forgive others and How to forgive others, please refer the book: “Forgiveness How and Why”, written by Naran S. Balakumar.

Jay

I have a problem letting go or forgiving people. Is there any switch word for it?

Naran

If you don’t do the forgiving exercise, you will undergo same emotions, even though situations may be different.

If you do not want to meet or interact with same people in future, Forgiving is the only way.

There is no shortcut for letting go the resentment and anger.

Do not act from ego; have higher perception and think that every event in our life is happening as per our desire. Before taking the birth, I want this life with these people to mend my life. But unfortunately after taking birth, we forget our commitment.  When the situation is created as per our desire, instead of learning lessons and moving forward, we get stuck and we refuse to forget or forgive.

What is the one that prevents you from forgiving? Release that and do it.

I Jay forgive you —–(name of the person). You please forgive me and release me. This can be done mechanically without the involvement of the heart.

Jay

Do I just have to fill the name or action that upsets me?

Naran

 “I Jay forgive you —–(name of the person). You please forgive me and release me”.

Take a person with whom you are angry. Insert his or her name in the space given above. Chant the same for 200 times a day.

Forgiving Exercise

Affirm, “I (your name) Robert forgive you Ashok (replace with name of the person to be forgiven). You please forgive me and release me”.

This can be done mechanically without the involvement of the heart.

Write a list of persons with whom you are angry. Take one person out of that list. Insert his or her name in the affirmation given above. Chant the same for 200 times a day.

Questions regarding Forgiveness Exercise

Nayana

I have two queries related to Forgiving exercise.

I have too many people to forgive in my life, so please guide me how to forgive them with once for all.

I see my husband is having so much resentment in his life with so many people but he doesn’t try to do any of the exercise to forgive and forget. So is there anything I can do on behalf of him, as it’s affecting my life all the time.

Naran

  1. Take a list of all of them. Do the forgiving for all. Take one at a time. Chant 200 times for each.
  2. You cannot do anything for somebody’s sake. What is your predominant thought or emotion when you deal with him? Release that one by one. If one goes, another will come. Release that also.
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