- Reflect on your life.
- Find in what situation you blamed others. Forgive them.
Who is the controller of your life?
Is it me? You cannot control your life. If you fall down you will have to go to the hospital. I do not have control. Then what is the meaning of this statement. When I surrender to the Divinity only, I will take control of my life.
Let us go deeper now. I am not the doer and Divine is the doer. This we will accept lovingly.
Here we have to cultivate the habit that you are not the doer. What happens when I am the doer? Everything will be wrong then. But everything goes right when you think that Divine is the doer. When you think that Divine is the doer, there will be surrender.
A tendency to blame others
We always have the tendency to blame others. We say, “I didn’t have proper sleep because my wife always disturbs me,” When there is no power supply we blame the government. When I am hurt in an accident, we say, “I was properly walking but that auto fellow came and hit me”.
In ordinary life, for each and every situation or event we will be blaming others. Who is spoiling me in my life? When you blame others you have to remember that he is also not the doer. Nobody is responsible for this.
When I am not the doer we happily accept that. When your work is blocked or delayed, the divine is waiting for the right time and he is the doer. When you bring this thinking you can take control of your life.
“My Mother is the cause of my husband’s death”, a case history
One mother and daughter are there. Daughter is married and more than 45 years old, living in a foreign country. About five years back her father expired. The mother has three daughters and all are away.
Mother used to disturb the daughters telling that somebody has to come and look after her. In their caste only the daughter has to look after the mother it seems. I asked the daughter to cut the cord (between the mother and her).
One day, the mother asked the daughter, “Suppose if your husband dies, whether you will come back to me”. The son-in-law died after three months. From then on the daughter could not forgive her mother at all. Whenever she sees her mother she becomes angry. But that lady is a philosophical lady.
The daughter came to me and told that even after taking the Bach Flower Remedies Holly and Willow she could not be alright. I told her that Holly and Willow say to you that you have to change your attitude.
When you say that you are not the doer, then you think that your mother is also not the doer. Keep chanting. “I am not the doer, she is not the doer and Divine is the doer”. After chanting this for one hour her heart became lighter. For the next two days she was chanting this and she became completely alright.
Till such time you are blaming others you are not in control of your life. So, whatever may be the problem, think that the Divine is the doer! The problem will be solved automatically. Then only you can take control of your life.
Some time ago I explained to you about some sexual harassment that I was suffering, from near my home. You asked me to forgive them and it worked. They are no longer around blocking my path.
Unfortunately now – post clearing resistance to love – one of them has decided he is in love with me. Naran please help me I do not want this!
I feel like this may have been why I originally created the tendency not to receive love from people to avoid unwanted advances. This man is too old for me and not at all what I had in mind.
Please help me! I do not want to receive love from inappropriate places. I want to continue to be open to receiving love that does not make me feel bad.
Do the forgiving exercise for this man.
Say “I thank you old man for keeping away from me” three times daily.
Okay. I will do. What is the root cause of this? I feel I am always in this type of situation. It makes me become a separatist. I’m tired of it!
Grace, let us NOT think about why this is happening (and allow our ego to play games).
Heal as and when the situation arises. Release all your anger and resentment.
You can take a paper and write down your anger stories. Go on writing without reading what you wrote. Burn the paper or dip the paper in water and tear it.
Do the same for the second day and so on, until you feel that there is nothing to write.
I want to let you know that the man who was bothering me has lessened his advances. This is unprecedented. I will continue to thank and forgive until it stops.
I have not yet done the writing out exercise but I will try soon. Step by step everything is working.
Purpose of giving the forgiving exercise to Grace
A couple of questions had come to me asking why they should ask for forgiveness, when others have done the mistake.
I hope the above story will convince you now. Anyway, I will offer some explanation here.
Don’t take any words literally (I will post few articles on this topic).
When we do the forgiving exercise, we break off from our problem situation.
Otherwise, our thoughts and feelings about the situation – I mean our connection to the problem situation, will sustain it further.
(From Multi Dimensional Healing June 27 Workshop)
What is known as a karmic effect? Karma is not sin as many think. We have to come out of the thinking that we have done something wrong.
To learn something, mind has certain way of operating. One of the ways of operating is based on formula(s) a = b and cause is equal to effect. (B: C>E)That’s why karma effect has come in to our thinking process.
How to handle the present? Coming out of the emotions and be in the present is one way of nullifying our karmas.
When something happens all of us get any one of four types of emotions. First, the situation may kindle fear in us. If it’s persistent it becomes a worry. If problem is not solved then we feel sad. When nothing happens after so much of effort, then we get angry. Our mind knows only these four emotions.
If we come out of the emotions, the present is handled beautifully because our own habitual thoughts and emotions bring in the karmic effect.
Something happens and I react. If we react the same way we act like a robot. There is no difference in results. If I change the reaction – for example, if you become calm instead of getting angry, then your future also will change.
How to handle the present? God provides solutions thru nature. Use them to heal the present. Mudras, Flower Remedies help us come out of the ruling emotions.
Purpose of forgiving
By employing these techniques, we are healing ourselves. We have to categorically differentiate soul from mind. When we want to take revenge, it’s happening from the mind, not from the soul – which is only observing. The soul is beyond all these unwanted emotions.
Conscious mind will always make you think that there is a need for revenge and anger. Purpose of mantra is to correct the conscious mind. We do that help of the forgiving exercise. It’s an art which makes the other person think differently about you. It cuts our thinking pattern. We think we need to react to anger, while our true nature is to love and forgive.
Janma after Janma Same Story Same Endings
We are always living the same pattern for many Janma or lifetimes. That’s why we have met here again today. I would have taken class for you in my previous lifetime also.
How did we learn our emotional patterns – anger or sadness? We learnt from our parents. We live the life of our parents – who got their behaviour pattern from their parents. We are living out the same garbage.
During the last Janma, we had same or similar relationships and same behaviour and thinking patterns. How can one break these patterns? How to win over the mind and move spiritually? We will see that in the coming posts.