Reply to Suja by Naran S. Balakumar
Read your mail.
You have not received a job offer yet, in spite of having completed your post-graduation as a rank holder nine months ago. I know that you have done your diploma in Business Management too. Congratulations!
You have mentioned that you are feeling frustrated, dejected, getting angry, as well as blaming god and others for your situation. Given the situation this is the normal reaction we can expect from anyone.
What did you learn in your Management course? One has to think differently to find a solution. Therefore, think differently. Find out whether your thoughts and feelings are energizing you or they are draining you. These feelings will not only keep you in the same state of not getting a job, but will make your life stagnate too.
Get Into the State of Employment
Since you are a mathematics student, I will explain this in the form of a mathematical equation.
X = Y + 10, where X is the event of not getting a job and Y is your present state of mind. You do not have a direct influence over X. But, you can change Y into Y-1 or Y-2., which will in turn affect and change X. I mean, if you change your state of mind (Y), X cannot remain the same. Because Y has changed, X has to change too. Thus a state of unemployment will change into a state of employment.
Utilize the Lean Period
Think differently. You have to utilize this dark period. Accept that this period is necessary for you. May be the learning is not yet over for you. Academically it may be over. But, learning has to be continued. Learn something new in this period. You need not pay for a course. You can pick up lot of stuff from Internet. Learn something more about subjects that are allied to your specialisation. Enjoy the interviews that come your way. You will learn what you don’t know. Fill up those gaps. Learn to listen.
Increase your self-esteem
You can learn a lot by observing people. Learn to understand your existing relationships – with your family members, friends, and relatives. Move with them closely, express and communicate with love as if you were meeting them for the first time and as though this would be the last time you are going to meet them. Contribute something to them lovingly. Help them in any manner you can. It need not be financial. This will boost your self-confidence and enthusiasm. Normally one feels confident and enthusiastic only after getting the job. Now, you are acquiring this state before getting the job.
Period of Relaxation
This will also make you a better person. You will learn how to relate to your colleagues and superiors. When you are ready to learn anything new, then this period would become a period of relaxation, instead of a period of frustration.
Self-Mastery is the Key
Learn about yourself. Understanding your mental state will be highly beneficial. Write a journal of the emotions you are feeling for one week. Also write about your reactions to events as well as your behavior. Watch your emotions and thought patterns. Put everything in writing. To your surprise, you will find a pattern in your behavior. This is your mental state in the past. This is going to be the mental state for your future if you don’t make changes to yourself. Circumstances may change. Events may change. But this is you.
Fulfillment At last
Therefore, utilize this period to effect a change where necessary. Release what you don’t need and develop more what you need. This self-rectification will help you in self-actualization. Self-actualization is nothing but self-fulfillment in life. Job is offered by god. The employer is only a tool. God is your employer. He will always do what is right and is required by you.
Chant OM NAMO BAGAVATHE.
Best of luck
Naran S Balakumar
Posted in Career, Job Related, Life
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For more detailed explanation on Why we need to forgive others and How to forgive others, please refer the book: “Forgiveness How and Why”, written by Naran S. Balakumar.
I have a problem letting go or forgiving people. Is there any switch word for it?
If you don’t do the forgiving exercise, you will undergo same emotions, even though situations may be different.
If you do not want to meet or interact with same people in future, Forgiving is the only way.
There is no shortcut for letting go the resentment and anger.
Do not act from ego; have higher perception and think that every event in our life is happening as per our desire. Before taking the birth, I want this life with these people to mend my life. But unfortunately after taking birth, we forget our commitment. When the situation is created as per our desire, instead of learning lessons and moving forward, we get stuck and we refuse to forget or forgive.
What is the one that prevents you from forgiving? Release that and do it.
I Jay forgive you —–(name of the person). You please forgive me and release me. This can be done mechanically without the involvement of the heart.
Do I just have to fill the name or action that upsets me?
“I Jay forgive you —–(name of the person). You please forgive me and release me”.
Take a person with whom you are angry. Insert his or her name in the space given above. Chant the same for 200 times a day.
Affirm, “I (your name) Robert forgive you Ashok (replace with name of the person to be forgiven). You please forgive me and release me”.
This can be done mechanically without the involvement of the heart.
Write a list of persons with whom you are angry. Take one person out of that list. Insert his or her name in the affirmation given above. Chant the same for 200 times a day.
Questions regarding Forgiveness Exercise
I have two queries related to Forgiving exercise.
I have too many people to forgive in my life, so please guide me how to forgive them with once for all.
I see my husband is having so much resentment in his life with so many people but he doesn’t try to do any of the exercise to forgive and forget. So is there anything I can do on behalf of him, as it’s affecting my life all the time.
- Take a list of all of them. Do the forgiving for all. Take one at a time. Chant 200 times for each.
- You cannot do anything for somebody’s sake. What is your predominant thought or emotion when you deal with him? Release that one by one. If one goes, another will come. Release that also.
Posted in Affirmations, Life
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