From the “I Love Myself” Workbook
Do the following exercise
What should you eat and what you should not eat. Make a list and follow that to the core.
Sometimes body does not accept certain types of food. Yet, we try to eat the same food again and again.
Instead you have to prepare a list of items which you can eat and list out all those which your body does not accept.
When you prepare the list you are giving a commitment to your body and you need to follow that.
- Another thing is that whatever ways you behave outside we behave in the same manner with the body too. “I should not say this because the other person will be wounded”. Thinking like this, to please him, we tell a lie.
When you can’t meet a commitment, don’t make one
Suppose someone invites us for wedding. To please him we say that we will come definitely. But, we do not go to the wedding at all. I have also committed such mistakes.
Later on I found out that when I say something it is not a commitment to that person but it is a commitment to the God. I questioned myself, “Am I cheating the universe”?
Then I decided to tell the truth. If I am able to go I will say yes. Otherwise, I will say that I will not be able to make it.
Like that if you tell me that you are meeting me next week then it means that you are not making a commitment to me but you are committing to the Universe.
Commitment to our body
If one food is not being accepted by the body, we tell that I should not eat this food again. This is a commitment that you are giving to the Universe.
Next time when we eat that food again then we are breaking our own commitment.
The Universe is always watching all of us because it is the web of life. If I have to get my food at 1 p.m., it is already decided that it will come from a particular person.
By restraining yourself by not eating certain food, you are honoring your own body.
In this world there are four rules:
- You don’t get what you desire or what you want.
- You get what you don’t desire or what you don’t want.
In between these two rules, how to create what we want?
- To get what you want, accept what you get. When you accept what you get, you like what you get.
- When you like what you get, you get what you want.
A case history
My in-laws came here last Sunday. From the day they came here, my three-year old daughter Hema wants all her work to be done by my mother in-law. That actually doesn’t bother me.
However, I like to sleep with Hema. It so happened today that she wants to sleep with my MIL, instead of sleeping with me. I felt really bad that Hema does not understand my feelings and is avoiding me. I felt, ‘Am I not giving enough love to her?”
My MIL feels really happy when Hema ignores me and says that she wants to be with my in-laws.
Now I’m hurt that Hema is totally ignoring me and doesn’t want to sleep with me!
There is no motive for any child to behave rudely. It is natural that all the children want to be with their grand parents. Go to my blog and read the story of Mangala on Bach Flower CD: http://healbymeditation.wordpress.com/2009/04/24/meditation-on-bach-flowers/
Allow the child to be as she is. The more and more you want your child to be with you, at the same time have a grudge against your mother in law the child will be drawn to her only.
- Chant the switch words, “Together Divine”
- Also, take the Bach Flower Remedies Holly and Chicory. Give it to your MIL also. Put Walnut and Willow in the common water.
- Tap on yourself (all the points) continuously whenever you find time and affirm, “I accept totally what is happening to me. Love Thanks Divine.”
Suffering mentally is optional. Whenever we accept what is happening, we get a new meaning to our life and at the same time, whatever we wish will happen automatically.
When my MIL laughs and speaks that my kid is very much attached to her rather than me, then I get the grudge on her. She has once told our family members, in front of me, that she wants my kid to be attached to her rather than me. I was hurt with her words. You may think that I’m blaming her. This is the fact and this is how she spoke.
Anyhow let me try chanting the affirmations and let you know.
What we do normally when we are wounded or hurt. We may grudge, blame, curse dislike and become furious. All these emotions get outside our auric field, get clogged in the atmosphere and influence or affect us because we draw the same energy from the atmosphere.
Moreover constant and consistent undesirable emotions of this type may travel and join similar emotions in the world, paving way for violence, murder etc. Thus, we contribute indirectly to the violent world outside. Do you want to hold on to these emotions?
Another way is just to accept and ignore wherever possible, the comments made by your MIL.
Affirm to yourself, “Hurting others is her (MIL) nature. Loving and becoming lovable (whatever may be the provocation) is my nature”. If you practise this (very difficult), she will also change.
Changing yourself should be your goal. Take it as a challenge.
Do a lot of forgiving exercise. This will give you more power.
Take the remedies. You will understand.